I believe that I am suffering from a never-before diagnosed disorder. Since I am the first person to discover this condition, I shall name it Brooke's Disease, otherwise know as Obsessive Multi-Tasking Disorder. Please continue reading for a comprehensive overview of this dreadful disease, it's symptoms, and possible cures.
Obsessive Multi-Tasking Disorder has long been a suspected condition, but it was conclusively diagnosed this morning while I was blow drying my hair. As I was standing there, head hanging upside-down, I happened to notice a towel that had fallen to the floor on the other side of the room. I tried to tell myself that I would pick it up as soon as I was finished drying my hair, but that seemed like such a waste of time. So I slowly started strrrreeeetching my leg over toward the towel, head still hanging upside-down, still blow drying and brushing. It took me a good 3 minutes to finally inch my way over to the towel (we have a long bathroom), blow dryer cord nearly pulling out of the socket, hair nearly dry and, with amazing dexterity, pick the towel up and (head still hanging upside-down), hang it back on the towel rack.
It was then that I realized the extent of my condition. I can not bear to just be doing one thing at a time.
If I am making dinner, I need to also be on the phone with a friend or helping a child with their school work.
The other day I was driving to the store, balancing a pile of Christmas cards on my lap and afixing stamps on them. There was no rush to get them to the Post Office. But just sitting at a stop light waiting for it to turn green seemed like a waste.
Obsessive Multi-Tasking Disorder has long been a suspected condition, but it was conclusively diagnosed this morning while I was blow drying my hair. As I was standing there, head hanging upside-down, I happened to notice a towel that had fallen to the floor on the other side of the room. I tried to tell myself that I would pick it up as soon as I was finished drying my hair, but that seemed like such a waste of time. So I slowly started strrrreeeetching my leg over toward the towel, head still hanging upside-down, still blow drying and brushing. It took me a good 3 minutes to finally inch my way over to the towel (we have a long bathroom), blow dryer cord nearly pulling out of the socket, hair nearly dry and, with amazing dexterity, pick the towel up and (head still hanging upside-down), hang it back on the towel rack.
It was then that I realized the extent of my condition. I can not bear to just be doing one thing at a time.
If I am making dinner, I need to also be on the phone with a friend or helping a child with their school work.
The other day I was driving to the store, balancing a pile of Christmas cards on my lap and afixing stamps on them. There was no rush to get them to the Post Office. But just sitting at a stop light waiting for it to turn green seemed like a waste.
I eat my bowl of oatmeal each morning while sweeping the floor or checking my email (OK, usually both).
And don't get me started on bathroom time . . .
OMT Disorder is a serious illness which appears to be most prevelant in women, particularly those with children. There are currently no known cures, although symptoms seem to temporarily subside after a long bath or full-body massage. A strict regimen of herbal tea is often prescribed; caffeinated drinks appear to exacerbate the condition.
I'm afraid that my case may be terminal.
3 comments:
I may have that. Here is a tip for when you don't have a task while you are driving. Keep baby wipes in the car and you can clean the dash and steering wheel area while at a light.
Thanks Meghan! Great idea. It beats my usual stop light routine - reaching in the back to try to clean up pieces of cereal and goldfish crackers that my kids have spilled. I can't count how many times I've nearly rear-ended someone because I was twisted around trying to tidy up the back seat and I took my foot off the brake and started rolling forward. (Now no one is going to let their kids ride in a car with me).
That's okay, every morning while driving to work, I would put on my makeup, and drink my daily Diet Pepsi to get me through the day. I believe most women do suffer from this!
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